What Your Clients Are Actually Thinking (But Can't Say Out Loud)"

You're telling me I need a password manager AND single sign-on?

This is some serious bullshit. Why do I even have to log in to half this crap anyway?

I don't even know what 80% of it does except show up on my credit card every month.

It's like—why the hell do I need so many freaking cables run just so I can have WiFi?

And now I need to restart my computer because Microsoft added another emoji to Teams?

We have so many devices (PCs, MACs, servers, phones, tablets.) So many apps. So many monthly bills.

Really, it is more computing power than ever. And we still can't compute ourselves out of a wet paper bag. The left hand still doesn't know what the right hand is doing, and we need to use ChatGPT to tell the difference between our ass and a hole in the ground.

Wait, WHAT? Now you're telling me I need an MDM? Do you think I am some sort of sadist? What the fuck is an MDM? You have to be fucking kidding me. I need to spend another $6 a month PER DEVICE to manage an iPad? And I need to enroll my organization in Apple Fucking Business Manager? TO MANAGE A TABLET?

And what kind of AI do you need to know the difference between Copilot, Copilot Chat, Copilot 365, and Copilot fucking Studio?

And help me out here—you're telling me I need a SIEM to monitor everything. And if I understand correctly, I need an MDR to interpret the data ON the SIEM.

So I need to pay someone to watch a thing that watches my things? You know what?

“Take your MDM and stick it in your endpoint."

Yeah.

That's what your client is thinking.

They won't say it because they don't want to look stupid or irresponsible.

So they say: "Let me review the proposal and get back to you."

Which actually means: "Please. For the love of god. Just leave me alone."

And here's the thing:

They're not wrong.

I know, I know. I can already hear the objections in my own head:

"But they DO need MFA! Breaches are real!"

"MDM is necessary for security!"

"SIEM and MDR are industry best practices!"

Yeah. They got to me too.

Because here's what nobody wants to admit:

Most of this complexity exists because we built systems that created the complexity in the first place.

You need a password manager because vendors built 47 different systems that each need a login.

You need SSO because you bought 47 different systems.

You need MDM because Apple decided you can't just... use an iPad.

You need SIEM because you have so many systems generating logs that nobody can track it anymore.

You need MDR because the SIEM generates so much noise nobody can interpret it.

We're selling solutions to problems we created.

And the worst part?

I can't stop.

Because if I told my clients "you don't need most of this," they'd:

The IT industry:

The monthly recurring revenue complexity generator.

And I'm trapped in it just like you are.

Welcome to IT Contrarian.

Where we say what everyone's thinking but nobody can admit.

Subscribe if you're tired of pretending this makes sense.